By Will Aarons (’20) and Sydney Nguyen (’20)
On Easter Sunday, little boys and girls from across the Triangle frolicked in the spring weather, searching the foliage for candy-filled plastic eggs. However, while the pack stuck to jovial egg hunts, this intrepid pair of teens embarked on a much more spiritual hunt: the search for the best cup of boba tea the Town of Cary has to offer. Juniors Sydney and Will patronized all the hottest bubble tea stops so you don’t have to.
Their takes:
Quickly
Milk tea with boba and rainbow jelly
The noncommittal, off-beige color is enough to offput tasters from the start. The flavor of the milk tea, while smooth, leaves a lot to be desired. A murky tea-esque aftertaste is all that the “Premium Milk Tea” surrenders to the hapless imbiber. The bubbles are similarly disappointing. While the ideal boba mustn’t decompose without a fight, Quickly’s tapioca instantly splits in two, yielding compliantly to the whims of the canines. Meanwhile, they coat the roof of the mouth with an unpleasantly viscous resin. The blissful journey of chewing through an ideal bobum is best expressed in Jules Verne’s Journey to the Center of the Earth — the taste buds embark on a journey from the sweet, soft crust, through layers of increasing density within the bobum, to the cherished, saccharine core. Quickly’s boba offers no such Odyssey. The rainbow jellies, on the other hand, are delightful cuboids of artificial flavor. While their petroleum origins may offput organic purists, their plasticky texture offers a beautiful, crisp mouthful, punctuated by four perfect vertices and 12 flawless edges, leaving the mouth wanting more. It was only in tasting these jellies that we realized that math is truly beautiful.
Mango snow with mango jelly
The vibrant yellow slush hits the tongue with a pleasantly fruity, if a little sensational, initial flavor, but the sweetness belies an abrasive textural experience — the ice granules chart a violent course through the mouth. The ice and liquid, rather than seamlessly amalgamating, remain decidedly divorced, creating a consistency more reminiscent of a cheap snow cone than a quality boba beverage. Despite the profound ice crystal fallout, the mango stars redeem the lackluster beverage with their uniquely gratifying mouthful. They carry a blatantly artificial mango flavor, but their five crisp vertices grant a sensory experience that continually thrills.
Kung Fu Tea
Kung Fu milk tea with boba
According to Kung Fu Tea, their milk tea is made with “Real Kung Fu.” This may be true, but what else is in it? Certainly not tea. At the start, the acrid taste of imposter tea assaults the unwitting mouth. Instantly, the abundance of powdered milk overshadows any semblance of flavor with its bland, chalky taste. The woeful tongue is left with no more than a stale, indelible patina of false tea and false promises. The boba, however, almost make up for this farce of a brew. They constitute by far the best boba experience of the Triangle area: they are the exemplars of the boba Odyssey. Honey-soaked and tender, each bobum makes a transcendental pilgrimage from the subterranean roots of the tapioca farm to the welcoming taste buds which await in Kung Fu Tea’s sleek, modern interior.
Taro slush with boba and nata jelly
Contrast is the name of the game. At first glance, the jet-black orbs and snow-white rectangles complement the taro root’s lavender hue, creating an oddly religious concinnity. The slush is icy, uniform, and retains a plush, snowy smoothness that is welcome on a hot summer’s day in the subtropical climes of North Carolina. This chill, juxtaposed with the warmth of the boba syrup, coalesces to form an expansive journey through the entire length of the thermometer. The taro tea carries an agreeably sweet yet floral flavor unlike any other tea we sampled. The nata jelly captures the essence of coconut in a cuboid, distilling a beautiful day in the Bahamas to a single prism. The vitality of the vertices — fermented flawlessly by the microbacterium Komagataeibacter –goes without saying. How poetic that such freshness can emerge from the supple orifices of the decomposing; how uplifting that from the darkness undergirding layers of fertile loam, the primordial majesty of the taro root prevails!
Milk Lab
Brown sugar milk tea with boba
This laboratory (or sanctuary?) of dairy might oft flaunt its organic milk, but its products silently flaunt their rich, unadulterated tea flavor in each sip. Its authenticity shines through, even below a prodigious amount of topping, in the clean, unsullied flavor of the Ceylon Black Tea. It would seem that the addition of brown sugar would drown the taste buds in a saccharine swamp, but the syrup complements the beverage in a graceful way, bringing out the tea’s sweet notes while contributing its own understated, smooth veneer of caramelized goodness. This all makes it the more the shame when, eventually, the flavor fades, with only a moiety of the drink consumed. The boba? Passable, but they carry a blandness far outshone by the tea’s rapturous flavor. Their white color adds an ephemeral moment of novelty, but that too — like the brown sugar and, frankly, human existence — flickers away, leaving transient glimmers of what once was. It seems Milk Lab has sacrificed quality for appearance (like our societal values in the Information Age), and the unforgiving scales of our expectations have not tipped in their favor. Besides the disappointment of the boba, the Milk Lab consistently delivers on small, thoughtful details that change the beverage game. Namely, while we have sung reverent hymns in the name of vertices, their novel ice cubes have refreshingly smooth edges which amplify the drinking experience without interference. Meanwhile, their increased surface area ensures uniform cooling. While ice cubes hailing from other establishments collide (inelastically) with each other and the sides of the cup, these beautiful ice forms produce only a harmonious tinkle.
Thai tea with toasted milk cap, strawberry jelly, and mini boba:
The Thai tea produces a vibrant flavor experience, equal parts sultry, smoky, and smooth, conjuring the image of a jazz singer, clad in a slinky silk dress, who croons atop an ebony piano. The strawberry heart jellies, while lacking in a few vertices, provide both a soft, lofty crunch and a comfortingly artificial strawberry-esque flavor. The toasted milk cap is deliciously velvety and salty, and the welcome touch of hazard lent by the blowtorch pushes affluent teens to the limits of their sheltered existence. But dulce periculum: the smoldering flames extinguish all in their path and beget a renewed decadence ex nihilo. Below, the mini boba provide a shortcut through the oft-lauded journey of conventional boba — while dampening the contrast and chewiness of each single bobum, their combined impact serves to break up the monotony of the texture as the boba either fuse into one chewy bundle or separate into multiple discrete units. As evidenced by our wide-spanning choices from the menu, the Milk Lab offers a variety of enticing toppings and combinations. While other establishments also offer a motley assortment, the Milk Lab is the only place that is assuring enough to try these combinations: even the most tremulous sipper is ensured that they will not regret their choice.
tl;dr
If you have time and a few extra dollars, Milk Lab is the way to go. It’s an unassuming oasis amid the wasteland of Cary’s suburbia, quenching the thirst of parched passers-by. While the options on the menu are limited and the prices soar, each product carries an exacting artistic vision worthy of even the most discerning boba palette.
Short on time? Kung Fu Tea is for you. Its convenient location, expansive offerings, and reasonable price make it suitable for all your boba needs. However, introverts beware: unwelcome rendezvous with miscellaneous CA students is next to inevitable.
As for Quickly? For all its charms, steer clear. The name Quickly obfuscates its terminally slow service. When I pulled up Wednesday evenings before my piano lesson, I was late every time. Rest assured we’ll ~Quickly~ skrtt past from now on, and we recommend you follow suit unless you’re in an unfortunate pinch.
